Whoopadeefriggin’ Doo.
Not a whole lot to report from Texas of late, and not a whole lot on my mind. Maybe I’m crazy, but I’m feeling rather gruntled thesedays, and finding things to whine about that are strong enough to write down is tough going.
But who knows, maybe the winters here will suck.
What’s that? An average temperature of 75°F in winter? Well I guess they probably won’t suck.
So, in lieu of a rant about weather or traffic or Walmart or one-horse towns, I’ll drop a few of my favorite photos on you. Well, a couple from the day when I remembered to bring the camera, at least.
Fishin’ From the Pussywagon
As you can see, I like to ride in style. Yes, the back is carpeted. Yes, I smoke cigarettes. Yes, I have a paddleboat.
Orb Weaver at Spring Creek
Boo, Kids! It’s a big-assed spider! Actually, it surprised the hell out of me, and I almost walked into it face-first. It's a Golden Orb Weaver (Argiope aurantia), and at about 4 inches long, it was inpressive as hell.
Bait Stealin’ Wankfish
This little fucker got three of my worms within a one-hour period. I held him up in the light, scolded him for being piggy, and after my wagging finger got tired, I threw him back. for the fourth time. As far as I could throw him.
Boring Development Post - sL lives
It’s been a long time since I got my dev on, but after a little prodding from good ol’ Wheatbread, we’ve decided to put Showlister, a project with truckloads of possibility, back on the road to fruition.
Yeap, I finally got my home network together enough to contribute more to the internet than snarky commentary and pictures of my feet.
Asshat Alert
It ain’t often in the open source community that you get to call out a fellow developer (being generous with that title there) for being a sneaky shit, but recently it was brought to my attention that one of the former team members on the Showlister project has decided to usurp the considerable audience sL has with his own meager and unstable offering. Nothing illegal, mind you – just a bit underhanded. It’s fairly obvious though, that the project's website ahem borrows liberally from this website, the latter being one that I spent weeks designing and coding. What an assclown. I’m just glad he never had access to the scripting.
Forgive me, Wheat, if you planned on roasting this guy on your blog, but after seeing that website… well, let’s just say I was inspired.
Anyway. On to the coding. Or the de-and-recoding. "He" was allowed into the sL project last year, and basically proceeded to take a dump on the codebase. This is what the to-do list looks like for the next few weeks:
.==========================================
ShowLister – TODO.txt
==========================================NEXT VERSION 1.0
#unfscking the codebase, round 3 (getting there)
#undoing freak2532’s changes
# unfsck user account settings editing
# Remove GET variable session handling and loggedout behavior is far too easily compromised and it looks like shit. All session variables should probably be passed via POST or COOKIE.
# Remove extranneous security level display. It is cluttery, and the premise is flimsy.
# protect the admin user so it can only be modified, never deleted.
==========================================
*** THIS ENDS GRIPING NERDNESS POST ***
Hey?! Where’d The 'Box Go?
On Summer vacation, of course.
Yep, been enjoying the great outdoors here, getting a good tan and generally drinking in my new surroundings. What do I mean by surroundings, you ask? Well, beer, for one. Beer is awesome. I've also been enjoying the flora and fauna of the Texas Hill Country.
I’ve seen more stars than I have in years, including what looked to be a Flaming Winnebago reentering the atmosphere this past Saturday night. Ask my brother, he was there. I was about 2.75 sheets to the wind at the time, so I wondered aloud if the Free Mexican Air Force now had a space program, but I am reasonably sure it wasn’t a beer-and-dehydration-induced hallucination. Whatever it was, it was large and green and on fire; to wit, it kicked ass. The night sky is spectacular out here. I can also see the Milky Way pretty much every night.
Back to the point. Summer vacation always produces photos: some desirable, and–at least in my experience–some incriminating. These are both, really, most taken off-hand and in the best fashion of the random photographer. Anyways, here’s where I make with some pictures. There’ll be none of me in any easily identifiable compositions, as I am on the lam and don’t need the hassle from five-oh.
Some Photos
A. The Hat. It’s a ranchers hat, and it keeps the holy-shit-I’m-fuggin-on-fire! sun off your melon. Pair it with my recently reacquired prescription sunglasses (packed under S for miscellaneous) and you have quite the stylish Texas getup, if I do say so myself. Okay, well, maybe you have to be here awhile to appreciate it. Okay, Okay—I only wear it on weekends. Alone. In the tub.
B. Birkenstock Tan. Fairly self-explanatory, no? And yes, before you get all weird on me, I was born with semi-webbed toes. I’m an excellent swimmer, and I can pick up a hammer with my feet. Yeap. You're impressed.
C. Wasp Addendum. These two choice shots are ones I got of a Texas Red Wasp up close, after I had nuked him with a spray bottle of Popov vodka. He was stumbly-bumbly, so he let me get close, but I almost got the shit stung outta me as he sobered up.
D. This is a close-up of yours truly, taken surreptitiously by my brother while we were drinking large amounts of domestic beer. Ladies – note the azure blue eyes; They’re the real deal. (Ignore the dilated pupils.)
E. My Brother and his fish. We spent a few days in a row fishing for what amounted to bait, and then I caught a 10” Catfish. “Woot!” I said, “I caught the biggest fish and you suck!” Of course, minutes later he turns around and catches this 3-pound Bass, and proceeds to brag about it for the remainder of the visit. In fact I’m sure there’s an email in my inbox that has something to do with that fish. Dammit. I will have my revenge.
More to come when I get a new camera; the $400 one I currently have took a spill into the drink and only produces photos like this one:
Fucking gravity.
